annoying coworker The Chronicles of Bleh: My Annoying Coworker


The Husband

Recently saw The Husband. He comes by the office every now and then. Why? I don't really know. Perhaps Bleh sends him over to spy or something lame like that. He looks like he's lost weight but not in a healthy way, more of a gaunt kind of way. Maybe Bleh's new job keeps her too busy to cater to his every whim?

The world may never know.


Life Post-Bleh

I haven't seen Bleh for exactly 1 month. The workplace is oddly quiet and I've had to remind myself that I can get water from the cooler without having to see her.

There are so many little annoyances I keep bracing for that I don't have to any longer, now that she's gone. Seven plus years of trying to avoid Bleh will do that to a person. 

It's funny -- the last six months have brought so many positive changes into my life. The old supervisors are gone, Bleh is gone, and I have an office with two windows and a comfy chair now. I was even given a nice raise by the new Head Honcho. I need to get used to NOT being annoyed! LOL!

At the risk of sounding really cheesy, I guess I'm more appreciative of all the good things I have now that I've lived the hell of the bad things for so long.

For any of you out there dealing with your own Bleh at the office, if I can make lemonade out of lemons, so can you!


She's leaving!

Bleh actually got hired by another human that spoke to her. She's leaving our office in 2 weeks.

I admit I'm a bit nonplussed about the whole thing, as I don't have to see her on a regular basis now anyway, so her leaving is just kinda anticlimactic for me.

I spent the better part of 7 years dealing with her bullshit. Life has been so much lighter since my lateral promotion, the news of her leaving is just icing on the cake.

So, barring any particularly egregious behavior I hear about Bleh in the next two weeks, this is my last post on this blog.

Many thanks to you, Gentle Readers. You allowed me a space to vent and voiced your sympathies/support.

End of an era.


The end of the road

After many many years of daily suffering, my suffering is indeed over. I've been transferred to another department and am LOVING my new job! And my new office! And my new lack of Bleh!

Thanks to everyone who has commented with support over the years. To the haters, well...up yours.

I will still post things here occasionally, but now that I'm no longer working alongside a functional crazy person, I don't think I'll have much material. What a terrible problem to have!



Silver Linings

Bleh's on her cell chatting with her mother about scheduling flights for an upcoming trip.

The good news?

Bleh will be on a plane and not here in the near future. No annoying personal calls! YAY!


"Good" Parenting

So....Had a little chat today with someone who works in the other department Bleh is squatting in until our colleague returns from sabbatical. Turns out this person can't stand Bleh's drama-magnet  shenanigans either! (Who knew!?)

Turns out The Daughter, aka Mini-Bleh, has full-blown depression and is suicidal. She's dropped out of school and now apparently follows Bleh around the office: to the printer, to the bathroom, to the water cooler. Oh boy...

It gets worse. The Daughter is having to sleep BETWEEN HER PARENTS in their bed because she's on suicide watch or something! OMG and eww! Of course, we know this because Bleh can't keep her trap shut to save her life; if something's gonna get her attention, she'll say/do it.

Now, my heart goes out to this poor child. It's obvious that 18 years of smothering and  helicoptering by the two most insane and self-absorbed parents on the planet has finally taken its toll on her mental well-being; however, I think she can still be saved. If she moves out, gets some meds and therapy, and doesn't see her whacked mommie and daddy for a few years, she can probably overcome the snow job they've done on her. It'll be tough though --- especially since the kid has no money and thinks her parents are her best fwends.

Geez...Mini-Bleh is 18 so I can't call CPS. I guess I'll just have to hope for the best? Don't know what else to do.


More fake than fake

Bleh's been out of the office for two days because her 16 yr old son is sick at home.

Usually, this would not raise my eyebrow. However, it's currently a school holiday and The Husband has the days off as well. So, why isn't HE taking care of the sick kid?? Not that I want Bleh to be in the office, but dang, doesn't she realize how transparent she's being?

Doesn't The Supervisor get it? Apparently not.

Oh, the humanity. . .


Oh the mess...

As long-time readers know, Bleh is a crier. She cries when she's been wronged, when she's overwhelmed, when she's tired, when she's not getting her way, and definitely when she's deseperate.

The Head Honcho is retiring next month. With that knowledge, Bleh went to her this summer, cried about how she was worried about her job, and got herself temporarily PROMOTED to Department Head of a department whose Head went on sabbatical this Autumn! AND she got herself a raise in the process!

So what does Bleh do after brown-nosing her way to new heights due to having a sucker for a boss? Bleh complains. That's right, she f***king COMPLAINS about all the work she now has to do.

Um, excuse me,  Bleh, but you got a new title (that you did nothing to deserve!) and a chunk of change to do this new work, so STFU. The rest of us have taken on the burden of 2 or 3 new duties because of severe budget cuts and none of us got promotions or raises of any kind. We didn't even get a thank you; instead we did it because we want to keep our jobs in this sh*tty economy.

Wow. Give Bleh special treatment, give her everything she wants, and the crying continues. I can't roll my eyes back in my head far enough to display just how much of a baby she is. Seriously!

I'll be glad when she's thrown off her perch in January and her precious title and raise go away. Maybe she'll learn a little humility?

Nah, this is Bleh we're talking about. Humility isn't in her vocabulary.

P.S. She actually told everyone she was applying for another job in the next town over. I don't think she got it, though. She's still here.


Training Session

We had a short training session this morning on a new cms we'll be using here at the office. Bleh walked up to the trainer after the session to ask if she'd be given permissions to edit. The trainer said no. Why was I glad he said no? Because Bleh spent the entire hour with her head down, texting. Yep, she can't even pay attention for an hour. She's upset, but f*ck her.

If she can't take the time to pay attention, then she sure as hell shouldn't be given editing privileges.

Oh, and I found out she's applying for another job. This is excellent news! I hope she gets it and moves far far away.


More Texting...

Today, I had to go over to Bleh's desk to ask about a detail in a record. Of course, she was busy texting. Again. She's had her head down, thumbing at her phone, all morning. She actually made me wait while she finished her text! WTF? There's no texting required in the work we do -- none! Can she be any more obvious?!

Of course, The Supervisor either has had her head in the sand, or put her head in the sand after seeing Bleh's text-o-rama.

Le sigh.

Today is my six-year anniversary of starting this job. So glad I'm having such a super day. Ugh.


Texting, the new Personal Call

While on the one hand, Bleh's new texting obsession is much quieter than her previous personal call obsession, it's still distracting. I also just watched The Supervisor walk by Bleh's desk and Bleh kept on texting. We don't need to text for our job here. Like, never. Did the Sup say anything? Nope.

Wow. Just wow.

The Supervisor

Over the years many readers have asked about The Supervisor and what her deal is. (Dear gods, this situation has been going on for years! I need a minute...okay, I'm back.) She avoids conflict at all costs, hence Bleh's ability to get away with just about anything*. I learned recently that the Sup did not even want to become head of my department (this happened before I started working here) and that the Head Honcho basically moved her into that position.

Great. So what I've wondered about for years has been confirmed---I've got a timid (or apathetic?) supervisor on the one hand, and a functionally crazy person spazzing all over the office spewing narcissistic drama on the other. Lucky me sits in-between them. A colleague of mine who works in another department and knows firsthand of Bleh's special brand of Teh Crazy, told me to keep a log of all the nut-job things she does so  there would be a record in case Bleh gets let go for incompetence and decides to sue when the new Head Honcho comes later this summer.

In the good news corner: I didn't catch Mono. At least I don't think I did. Also, I had a phone interview last week regarding a very promising job elsewhere. We'll see if it scores me an in-person interview...

Today's Pants Report: Yep, wedgie. How does she wear those pants all day without screaming?

*Special hours, leaving during the day for random personal reasons, in-office babysitting, texting all day, etc.



Bleh's kid has mono. So what's the smart thing to do? Take him home after the doctor visit and put him to bed? Nope! Bring the sick kid to the office to spread the germs around! Thanks, Bleh! Thanks a whole f**cking lot!


"It's all about me!!" -- Bleh

So Bleh's mother-in-law (MIL) has been living with her and her family for the past 4 years. This is a pretty normal thing for many families. Just recently, the MIL decided to move to an assisted living facility because she no longer drives. Since Bleh & Co live in the middle of nowhere, this is a logical and necessary step.
Now, Bleh doesn't like her MIL and has "put up with her" ever since she moved in, which technically, the MIL never did, as she lived in a guesthouse in their backyard. So instead of being happy because she is now free of her MIL's daily presence, Bleh is "angry" (her word) because her husband's mother had the audacity to "make" them build a guesthouse for her, then live with them for 4 years, and then move out! How dare she! Who does she think she is? Family?!

I know, I know...only Bleh could be upset something like about this. I mean, really...someone does something that's best for them and, I might add, works out to Bleh's advantage, but Bleh gets mad because it's Not. About. Her. Everything has to be about her.

Don't believe me? Here's an example of just how narcissistic and awful Bleh is --- I got married a couple years ago. My wedding was on a Friday afternoon at 4pm due to various reasons/limitations. Bleh saw her invitation* and got upset (as usual) and actually had the balls to ask me, "Do you not want us to come to your wedding? Why didn't you schedule it at a better time for us?" 'Us' meaning her.

Yep, she asked me that. Because obviously my wedding was all about her.

I could have slapped her. Maybe I should have. But I didn't. I took a deep breath then explained that she certainly did not have to attend if she was unable to take an hour off work on a Friday afternoon.

Bleh did not end up coming to the wedding. (Thank the gods!) Many of my coworkers did, however, and we had a great time. Unfortunately, all those nice coworkers are in other departments and I'm still stuck with Miss Sourpuss seething across the room. Ugh. The negativity gets a little dense in here sometimes.

I've worked with Bleh for almost 6 years. A lot of readers continue to ask me, "WHY?" The only answer I can give is that the Universe has not yet opened a door for me to escape. It will happen. Maybe I'm paying off some karmic debt from a previous life? Perhaps. Until then, I will bide my time, breathe deeply, get as Zen as I can, and continue to vent on this blog. My schadenfreude is yours to consume, Gentle Readers.

*I couldn't invite everyone else in the office except her, right? Don't answer that.


"Whah whah other job isn't paying me enough... I'm gonna call people at my desk and bitch and moan about it while I'm working here at THIS job." -- Bleh

For the love of all that is good and holy, SHUT UP Bleh! Nobody here cares about your 2nd job and its problems. We especially don't care because you're supposed to be working here, not talking about job #2. Maybe you should quit this job and go work your other job and annoy those people instead!



Wow, I guess in the 21st century, people don't yell that anymore. Anyway, here's the big news:

Bleh is wearing a pair of pants that DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT go up her crack! This is a first! Amazing! I never thought a day would come where I would write such a thing. Sad (on many levels) but true.

Maybe she got tired of having fabric in places fabric shouldn't be? Maybe someone who cares about her told her about her consistent fashion faux pas? Who knows? Who cares? My eyes are not bleeding today and that, my friends, is a good thing.


Cell phones

I don't remember if I've mentioned this or not, but Bleh's been talking less on her cell phone lately while at the office. Until this week...chatty yakky yappy time ALL the time.

Just Adorable.

Awwww....Bleh and The Husband "spontaneously" decided to get breakfast this morning. At least that's the reason Bleh gave for being 30 minutes late today. Our Supervisor just giggled and didn't say anything to her.


Maybe I should pull that stunt tomorrow? I like a hot breakfast instead of cold poptarts at my desk any day.



Another colleague and i are working on a project. Said colleague came over to my desk to ask me about a couple files she had come across and wanted me to look at them to determine if we needed to keep them or not. As we were talking, Bleh, of course, asked us what we were doing and why my colleague had those files.

Heh! I stopped talking, looked at her, and said, "This is a project we are working on. Don't worry about it." Then I went back to my conversation. Bleh didn't butt-in again.

Small, but satisfying.


The First Camel Toe of Spring

Bleh's pants are ridin' up both sides today. Her camel toe is out and proud and told me that Spring will come 6 weeks early this year.
Ugh. Shudder.


On the phone again (and again)

I've been writing this blog for 5 years. Some things around here never change. This morning, The Husband calls Bleh to, wait for it..., that's right, make a phone call for him!

This man is so helpless! He has a Ph.D. yet he cannot call anyone but his wife to ask her to call people. I don't get it either.


Widdle Baby Boy Needs Some Sweep...

Bleh emailed us to say she'd be late this morning because she wanted her son to be able to sleep in before his last final exam today.

Uh, okay...? How does that make Bleh late for work?

Oh, right...The Husband is completely helpless, so obviously he can't take the kid to school. What a weird family. And yet again, they have an impact upon my workplace. Sheesh.